And this is the new @asbbank…
Just in case you were wondering why I haven’t been blogging or leaving the office lately, it’s been pretty busy. You can read more about the campaign on Admedia >. Or see it for yourself at creatingfutures.co.nz.
These are screenshots from some of the banners:
Cute new Telecom ad (no really it is)
Despite my many ties to Telecom and it’s advertising, I am not ashamed to say they run some uninspiring ads sometimes (perhaps I can’t let go of Spot the Dog). But every now and then they let something special slip through the client approval phase, this is one of those moments:
Still it’s not enough to get me to switch back from the 2 Degrees account I just set up.
BTW can you please email me if this page is all screwy in your browser and tell me what you are using? It looks like HTML maintenance time again.
Eye candy from The Craft Shop
I saw a few of these ads in IRL when they were running and loved the design. Today I discovered they are all out of The Craft Shop in Auckland. So beautiful! Enjoy.
Seeing words in colour
Apparently synesthesia is uncommon (1 in 23 people experience it) and people find it quite fascinating. I’ve experienced grapheme –> colour synesthesia for as long as I know.
As a young child my mum spelled out my name in jellybeans and I corrected her on the colours she used, because I experienced those letters differently. At that point I assumed all people saw letters, numbers and names in the same colours I did.
Looking at some synesthesia alphabets online there are similarities between what synesthetes see. I’ve made an alphabet of how I see letters and numbers:
I should note that some letters (like H or K) are completely different colours for me when they are in words. I see names in colours as well, and really dislike certain names because of this. The up side of the condition is I remember things like phone numbers or birthdays quite easily. I also see time in 3D.
I don’t “see sounds” or “taste words” like some extreme synesthetes, but I hate the taste of coriander because it reminds me of grasshoppers.
A fresh start for a family in need
Earlier this year I had the pleasure of working at Amnesia Razorfish in Sydney. The project I was most proud of has finally been launched!
Just by looking at houses listed on the REA site you can help a family in need get a house of their own. Check it out at freshstartproject.realestate.com.au.
For every page you visit on the REA site you are awarded bricks. A little icon follows you around the site showing how many bricks you have so far. Donate the bricks you collect to the project by posting a support message to Facebook.
When 1 Million social bricks had been donated work began on building a home for a family in need. People who had donated bricks on the site and real estate agents could all volunteer to help build the physical house.
The work in progress was filmed and blogged about. All credit is due to the people who turned this idea into a reality, a real home for a real family.
Pure shit copywriting
During a lecture at ad school we watched a TV documentary about a team at Saatchi & Saatchi London creating a new campaign for the Brazilian vodka (apparently it is more similar to rum) Sagatiba. The first idea they pitched was around the strapline “Pure so you don’t have to be”.
It was so bad that for the rest of the year it became a running joke. We’d often get briefs for organic or eco-friendly products, so we’d present “B_E_E organic dishwashing liquid is pure so you don’t have to be” or “Arano Orange Juice. Pure so you don’t have to be”.
Anyway it would seem one of the jokesters from my class has ended up working on 42 Below.
PS. Speaking of Brazil did you see the two decapitated corpses on Street View? At the time of writing Google had deleted one (view here) but the other was still viewable. Pretty gross.
My experience of Mad Men-esk parties
Last week half a cow was delivered to the office, so we had a barbecue to make space in the freezer for all the meat. It got me thinking about some of the crazy things I have seen over the past couple of years. I won’t name the companies involved, but too be fair some of the wilder parties were clients not agencies.
1. When I was not quite 18 I went to a pop star themed client Christmas party. The night involved driving between different drinking locations on a party bus, really classy. For a lot of the staff the party ended at Boogie Wonderland, but for a few us the night went on across the road. I have no idea how I got in without ID, but there was no door charge for ladies.
2. Just a couple of weeks later the world-wide CEO of the agency came to Auckland. On a sunny Friday morning it was announced that the whole agency (100+ people) were invited to lunch at Soul. I remember looking at the pricey menu and freaking out because the entrees were more than I made in an hour. At about 5pm I realised we were not going back to the office and I was not expected to pay for my lunch or the bottle of wine I had drunk over that time. So it’s true that long lunches still exist in advertising, but that’s the only one I’ve been to.
3. While I was in uni the for-mentioned client hired me part time. They threw a lot of really fun parties over the three years I was there, but one in particular stood out. It was jungle themed and therefore held at the Auckland zoo. The entertainment; midgets dressed as pigmies (photo above). Need I say anymore?
4. Another memorable client party was hosted by a high end fashion house. There was only one beverage “on tap”, but I wasn’t complaining about the constant refills of Moet. The party was held in a series of marquees put up on Bastion Point, which has an amazing view of Auckland. The Iwi were invited and I chatted to a school friend’s aunty about how bizarre we both found it to be standing outside a Marae surrounded by the world’s best sailors and fashion designers.
5. To finish off the list I should probably mention the time I made some ads for an airline and my boss took me and the client out for dinner and drinks. In Honolulu. The night started with some casual cockatails watching the sunset and one of Hawaii’s best hula dancers perform. Afterwards we got Japanese and ended the night at the infamous Yard House. Which is when the domain www.scrotumbags.com was purchased.
So yes this industry is every bit as seedy as Mad Men makes it out to be, but it is also as incredibly fun. Most of the time.
Why the 19th of September is an important date
Whether or not you like the current government you can thank Plato and Julius Caesar for your ability to vote.
Unless of course you are female, non-white or don’t own any land. In such cases you have more thanks to give, starting at the very least with the New Zealand suffrage movement lead by Kate Sheppard. Because of the petitions of women who wore white camellias pinned to their dresses, New Zealand became the first country in the world to grant universal suffrage (to adults over 21 years). The legislation was passed on the 19th of September 1893, which is why this date is so significant. The day women became citizens, in the true roman sense.
It is truly disappointing that an internationally important date such as this has been lost from our tradition. Today we should all be celebrating. Not just celebrating the rights of women, but celebrating the brave men who supported their wives and the ones who pushed the legislation through parliament.
If you are in Auckland City today take a white camellia down to the suffrage fountain. Or give one to a friend and remind them how lucky we are to live in a democracy. At the very least flick through Wikipedia and renew your suffrage knowledge.
Update
Oh hi, I live in Auckland now. More on that and White Camellia Day (commemorating the day women got the right to vote) later.
I am working at an amazing agency learning from the best in the business. I don’t actually have a contract or a salary, but I do have a swipe card to the building which definitely counts for something.
I’m writing this from the very first computer I have bought for myself. It’s a cute little macbook, but too be honest Apple doesn’t feel as special as it used to. Too many useless pieces of plastic in the box.
So we all know Australian news is atrocious, turns our Nightline is just as bad. Their headline story was about All Blacks captain Richie McCaw going to Chirstchurch to see the damaged homes. AND NOW it’s the ad break and Richie is back, promoting Verstile Home builders! You can watch the advert here > it’s about six months old, but obviously the Christchurch earthquake was too good an opportunity to exploit. TV3 please get some journalistic integrity.
Worst ad ever. Yes, worse than the “wash your vagina” one.
If you didn’t like being told that washing your bits would help you get a pay rise > then you will find the following ad incredibly condescending.
There are two more featuring Trevor and Ryan. (Via Make the Logo Bigger >)
They imply that a perfect man knows more about pads than you do. The Libra ads are hilarious because they do the opposite, make fun of how little men know. The boy who gets his period campaign was loved by men because they think it shows that they can write tampon ads better than women. I don’t want to get into an essay on how terrible most menstruation ads are, but these are prime examples of why more *talented* women need to be given jobs in the creative advertising.
I’m not talking about giving people jobs purely based on gender, I am talking about the creative directors who haven’t given me (and plenty of other ladies) a chance because I’m not “one of the boys”.
Or maybe where I went wrong with those types was not washing my vagina with Summer’s Eve before the interview.
The NZ ad depicting Muhammad’s image
A bunch of punks in Auckland have started a skate magazine called Muckmouth. Their website warns “If it still offends you… do not bother to complain as we still do not give a fuck about you”. Although I’d never heard of them until today their latest stunt is about to hit the international press (you heard it here first) because of this obscene sacrilege:
I can’t imagine Brian Tamaki’s following will take this very well, but no one has yet been killed for using his image in vein. On the other hand when Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten published 12 cartoons of Muhummad, their embassy in Pakistan was bombed. One 75 year old cartoonist will be in 24/7 police protection for the rest of his life because of the death threats and attempts against him.
What shocks me about these designs is not the derogatory way these figures are portrayed (haters gonna hate), but that someone actually pasted them up all around Auckland City:
Surely a poster which puts lives in danger breaches the advertising standards?
My guide to having a good time in Auckland
Lots of people seem to be heading to New Zealand for business and pleasure. While I’m sure you won’t get bored of the beautiful South Island, Auckland is another story. On first impression it can seem like a dreary version of Sydney with a slightly taller tower, significantly smaller harbour bridge and not a lot to do.
In reality Auckland has some great food, amazing beaches and lovely people. I am writing this guide so you can skip the dull bits and actually enjoy your stay in Auckland.
1. I may be biased because I grew up here, but I think most people agree it’s a pretty great suburb which can be summed up in one word: gentrification. You can still grab a decent coffee at some of Ponsonby’s original grungy cafes, just look for arty names like Cezanne or Byzantine.
For the best food in the city go for Italian words; Bambina for breakfast and Prego or S.P.Q.R. for either lunch or dinner. One of the best things about NZ being a farming nation is even in the hippest part of the big city you eat delicious fresh (often organic) food. You can tell the waitress you liked your meal in Maori by saying “ka pai te kai” pronounced ”car pie tea k-eye”.
2. About an hour north of the city are some of my favourite bits of the region. Goat Island has been a marine sanctuary since the 70s, you don’t have to swim very far from the beach to be surrounded by fish!
On the way there stop off at Matakana which is popular for it’s many vineyards and organic cafes.
3. Growing up I took black sand for granted, a whole side of Auckland’s coastline has it. After living in Australia for a while I have realised how incredible this phenomenon is. The best place to experience it is Muriwai Beach because you will also encounter spectacular wildlife such as the large gannet colony or seals.
You know how painful it is to touch a steering wheel when it’s been out in the sun all day? That’s what this sand is like, so wear closed shoes on hot days. Also remember to wear SPF30 sunscreen whatever the weather. Due to global pollution there is a hole in the ozone layer right above NZ. This means it’s very easy to get sunburned and the country has the highest rate of skin cancer in the world. If you want to undo some of the damage done to our environment consider donating to the NZ Cancer Society >
4. If you want a Haka there are plenty of places you can pay to see one performed. However if you want to experience real Maori culture I suggest you pay a visit to this Marae which is used daily by the Ngati Whatua, my adoptive Iwi! Although not technically open to the public if you go up during business hours you may be lucky enough to find someone who is happy to show you around.
The land which it sits on has a spectacular view of Auckland, and an intense history. Remember no shoes!
5. After a day exploring you may want to get into bed and appreciate one of the country’s finest talents… advertising. We must have easily won the most international advertising awards, per capita. NZ is particularly good at TVCs. To watch some fantastic ads tune into primetime telly like Outrageous Fortune which currently airs 8.30pm Tuesday on TV3.
Is there anything that needs to be added to this list?
My favourites from the 17th Biennale of Sydney
After weeks and weeks of mismatched schedules, my friend Andrea and I finally made it to Cockatoo Island to see the the Bienalle just before it ended. I’m annoyed I didn’t go to the other exhibitions to see more painting, but there were a few pieces which made the trip well worth it.
Top Sculpture: ‘Summit’ by Chinese artist Shen Shaomin.
This piece captured everything that fascinated me in Europe; display of glass coffins, Madame Tussauds and of course dead politicians. The first glass coffin I walked up to was Kim Il Sung and then I saw Ho Chi Minh, Mao Zedong, and Vladimir Lenin. Without reading a blurb I instantly recoginised each leader from the fantastic wax modelling and could assume it was a meeting of the great Communist minds. I saw Andrea standing next to Fidel Castro and thought what is he doing here, wont he live forever? When I walked over I realised the model of Castro was not in a glass coffin, but on a makeshift hospital bed with air being pumped out his mouth as though he was breathing.
Amazing.
Top Photography: ‘Goat Sluice’ by Kiwi artist Yvonne Todd
This exhibition had the perfect setting, an old lodge house which had 1960s wallpaper falling onto the floor. The slightly creepy portraits of teenage girls reminded me of Twin Peaks, especially the figure in “Goat Sluice” (left). Laura Palmer much?
Top Video: ‘The Feast of Trimalchio’ by Russian artists AES+F
We spend a long time sitting in a circular room with 9 screens playing this video. It was mesmorising and some how very relaxing. You can watch it on YouTube, but it has nowhere near the same effect:
Pioneering the interwebs does not equate to success #wavegoodbye
I recently watched a documentary called We Live in Public, about an internet entrepreneur called Josh Harris who physically predicted future online trends. In the 90s he was often compared to Andy Warhol, but Josh knew people didn’t want 15 minutes of fame, they wanted to be famous all the time. In the days of dial-up he invented social media by creating an underground “hotel” where residents interacted through 24/7 surveillance. When he got sick of that project he and his girlfriend moved into an apartment with cameras everywhere and crowd sourced their lives.
Yes that’s right he did that way before rubix cube guy had the idea.
The amazing thing is no one has heard of Josh Harris. Even the CEO of MySpace had no clue who he was, and yet he pioneered web 2.0. Go watch the movie.
I feel Wave has fallen to a similar fate, too advanced and bold for it’s time. Sure it probably would have taken off it had integration with Gmail, but that’s not really the point. People are saying they predicted it would fail because of various faults with the interface, but the interface did no justice to it’s working capabilities. The back end of Wave was far beyond anything else currently available and I sure hope in 10 years the whole internet functions the way it does.
Will be interesting to see what the talented team behind it end up doing. Josh Harris has been long forgotten and is currently living in Ethiopia, it would be sad to see the Google Wave team fall into the same obscurity. (Hopefully Greg leaves Google to become the next Willy Wonka.)
To all you haters, I hope in a few years you have the hindsight to see Wave pioneered Web 3.0.
The redundant use of hipsters in advertising
I saw some Haier billboards when I was back in my hometown, Ponsonby, which is now over run with hipsters. At first I quite liked them because they do exactly what advertising should do; make a purchasing decision easier for the target market.
But then I thought you can’t really claim to be a hipster if you buy cheap Earth-hating appliances made in China.
Or if you drive a car:
This ad like the Haier ones has some fantastic insight into the target market. Probably because most ad creatives are hipsters themselves. But my guess is the target market simply isn’t looking into those categories.
Hipster ads can be great if your product is organic or eco-friendly.
And small bright blue cars were best advertised when everyone was into azn street battles:
Beer ads have always been good and online they are great
I love beer ads, it’s probably the only category which is consistently awesome. I was never allowed to work on the beer accounts when I was at S&S, because I was 16-17 at the time. (Although no one stopped me drinking the stuff in the office.) Can’t wait to do some work as awesome as these:
A full social media experience based around a couple of Scottish lads (who are part time furries) brewing the strongest beer in the world. There are different stories around each of their different lagers, and the one which has really taken off is “The End of History” which literally puts the stout in stoat. These limited edition taxidermy beers made the sm rounds and quickly sold out:
Following on from the Chuck Norris meets Old Spice guy TVCS > is this online treasure hunt. I pitched an idea similar to this a little while ago so it was a pleasant surprise to see it executed well by someone else. The premise is treasures are hidden in adspaces on different sites and there are rewards for collecting them:
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This is simply brilliant, just a webcam on a sign in Mexico. I’ve always liked the idea of having a real life billboard used as a website, but the crucial element I was missing is the live webcam on it. You can’t help but watch intently to see if someone will come to clean the “website’s fountain” or repaint the “website menu”. Love it:
Lady Gaga flavoured tea brought to you by Twinnings
Yesterday I won a dozen cupcakes thanks to @TheRocks, by posting a picture of my favourite tea (Lady Grey on the left) in their #Aroma competition. Twinnings may now ditch Lady Grey to make way for their new flavour, Lady Gaga.
“The idea is to have tasting sessions in which she would participate… They want to market tea to a new, younger generation – particularly in America, and Gaga is making drinking tea cool again.” via Stuff.co.nz >
(News to me and all the teacup collecting hipsters that drinking tea is not cool.)
It will be a great success for anti drinking campaigners if Lady Gaga gets American teenagers drinking tea instead of booze. However Long Island Iced is probably the closest compromise they will come to.
Any guesses as to what brewed Lady Gaga will taste like?
In the homeland enjoying some kiwiana
Sad to hear the Goldstein ads are over, but there are a few funny suggestions on how to end his career >
I’ve always thought this looked like a fun job
Or rather, I used to wonder how I could work in the Google offices without knowing software engineering… and doodling was the answer. Although creative labs would probably be a better fit.
I want a jar of jam made from Princess Diana’s hair
Bompas and Parr have a very interesting company, designing food. When I first read about their jelly I was instantly reminded of The Simpsons episode where everyone brings a bowl of jello to the company picnic. That scene fascinated me as a child, trying to imagine that much jelly in a room.
B&P don’t just deal in jelly, but make all sorts of fascinating feasts and foods. The above jams are Absinthe and pineapple with sand from the Great Pyramids, Plum and Oak with wood from Nelson’s ship The Victory and Milk Jam infused with a speck of Princess Diana’s hair. Simply amazing.
They have done there is everything from a 12 course Victorian breakfast to a gin infused room where you can get drunk just by breathing in the air. Go to Jellymongers.co.uk to see more.
Stupid bank ads
Commonwealth have released a ridiculous bank ad. Their agency hired the director of Amelie (a movie I really love) and some how they made this complete garbage:
I thought that was bad, but I just saw this ad on a real estate site. I am a bit confused about the messaging, to me it reads as “No cash deposit. Actually just kidding mwahahaha”.
The best of missing cat posters
Cardon Copy is a project taking crappy street posters about lost pets etc and redesigning them.
See more including a lovely maths tutorial poster here >
I was reminded of these today after reading an email thread which made me cry with laughter while at work today. Ok just read it again and still LOLing. I usually find David Thorne’s emails too forced to be funny, this however is the most I’ve laughed since January >
My new goal is to get a lion
My RSS reader has been filled with hate lately, more specifically hate about Cannes. I agree with the general rage especially when people can win by creating a campaign for an obvious product running it once and entering it every year until it wins.
But I want one. I have made it my goal to have at least one lion on my shelf. Even if the good creative directors, decent clients and angry blog writers don’t care about awards. Why shouldn’t I be sipping Perrier-Jouet next to the French Riviera? That sounds awesome!
But I’m not going to cheat to win, I want to create a the kind of campaign which inspires this in it’s audience:
(Disclaimer: for me to win without cheating the judges will need to learn something about digital.)
Is it worth getting a huge loan to go back to school in London?
I have been given a fantastic opportunity to move to London and attend the famed School of Communication Arts.
I need to make a decision this week about whether I am going, right now it looks unlikely as the course fees are so expensive. I’m not too worried about the “the high cost of living” in London. If I can stay in Hilton on Park Lane for 50 pounds, surely rent is going to be cheaper than here in Surry Hills. What worries me is that I already owe $25,000 for my bachelors degree and I will need to borrow that much again to pay the fees for the school.
Is a few years of this worth that much money:
Probably. But how am I ever going to pay that off? Useful advice come hither!
